So, I'm going to preface this by expressing a few opinions on the show. This show was full of wonderful moments. I think the song choices for all characters involved were wonderful and spot on. Especially Mike and Tina's duet, and in actuality, I feel like theirs was the best duet of all. Don't get me wrong. I enjoyed the set up of the Sam/Quinn romance, and I'm eager to see what direction they're going to take them. Namely if Quinn will maintain her self-esteem and individuality. I just hope their budding relationship doesn't obliterate her "independent woman" attitude set up so well by last years choice to sing "It's a Man's World" (in what I personally believe was her best vocal performance all year) for a class assignment, and her insistence that she doesn't want to get lost in "needing" someone like she needed Puck last year.
I loved the hints of humanity they gave Brittany: that's she's more than just stupid one-liners and an easy lay. She's really not just snark. She has some heart. I also loved how they explored the depths of emotional pain Artie feels about his paraplegia, adn the huge ramifications of seemingly simple decisions. I loved the selfishness that drove Rachel to make a sacrifice, realizing that winning the competition might be bad for the overall goodness and cohesiveness of the group. Who cares that it was all just so Sam would stay and help them get to and win Nationals? Classic narcissistic Rachel, but this had a tint of thoughtfulness. And I loved how the plumbed the depths of Kurt's loneliness and isolation as the only openly homosexual person in school. Gay or straight, that truth resonates with everyone. We have all felt alone and isolated at some point in our lives because of some struggle we're going through.
I will say that if I have one ax to grind with the show it is their over-sexualization of Santana and Brittany - not only as individuals, but also in this grotesque bisexual co-dependency they have with one another. The scene with the two of them on Britt's bed all kissy, kissy was too much. At least they didn't go lip to lip. I've honestly never met anyone as sexualized as the two of them...but especially Santana. Somehow with her character it's more offensive. Maybe it's the fact that she's all up in everyone's face about it. Maybe it's because she has a guy's perspective of sex as some self-satisfying pleasure to be had as often as she wants. I'm not really sure, but I feel as though her character is little more than a high-school hooker in a cheerleading outfit. They took Santana a little too far this week...making her almost depraved. It's disgusting, even if it produces hilarious lines. And, because I'm so disgusted by it, I have to leave out some of her little snarky comments from my countdown because I honestly find them more offensive than Rachel and Finn dressing up like a Catholic priest and nun and singing about being "born again" in each other's love. (I will say that I thought they handled that number well. It was intentionally offensive to serve a purpose, and I don't feel they did it out of disrespect. I feel like by showing that it was disrespectful, that it produced a small teaching moment for people watching the show: that there is a thing as TOO far. Maybe they should listen to their own preaching and relax on the sexualization of the teens.)
So, now that I've written a novel about my opinion of last night's episode, let's get down to the list. Some of these will be multiple lines from multiple parties that lead up to a punchline:
12. Brittany (about Puck): He might be the dumbest person on this planet, and that's coming from me.
11. Rachel: The fact is, I'm only really generous when there's something in it for me.
Finn: Yeah, but I still like you.
10. Kurt (speaking about Sam's blond hair): I have three gifts: my voice, my ability to spot trends in men's fashion, and my ability to know when it comes from a bottle.
9. Finn: You tried to kiss her? Major Glee party foul, dude!
8. Mike: You can get salad at Dim Sum. My mom got salad last night.
Tina: There were chicken feet in it. It was a chicken feet salad. All I want is a normal salad that doesn't have chicken feet in it!
7. Santana: Look, I don't mean to be a B****, well, actually, I do.
6. Brittany: So, i just wanted to you to know...I'm really into you.
Artie: Sorry, I'm a little confused. You've never even made eye-contact with me
Brittany: I know. For a while I thought you were a robot.
5. Sam: He sent me like, sixty MP3's of him singing and I thought it was Faith Hill.
4. Quinn: The blueberry flavor is the worst. Especially if it gets down your pants. I looked like a creature out of Avatar down there when I got slushied.
3. Mercedes: Okay, do I even need to say it?
Sam: That was really rude.
Tina: But like REALLY rude.
Quinn: I seriously wanted to punch both of you.
2. Kurt: Once again, your closeted homophobia seeps to the surface like the contents of a crack cesspool.
1. Santana: I'm like a lizard. I need something warm beneath me or I can't digest my food.
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